While it is generally agreed upon that men are virtually always in a sex-ready state, there really are things that a woman can do – believe it or not, ladies – that are true boner killers. Well, let’s be honest, in some cases they might not be bad enough to actually stop sex altogether, but they can certainly cause a setback and may make him have to work a little harder to get the job done. The following list of 10 turn-offs are things that most guys find to be turn offs, so ladies who want to keep things spicy in the bedroom might want to avoid these classic missteps. Speaking of spicing things up, why not learn how to help a guy maintain a health penis? Find out how below.
10 Sexual Turn-offs That Totally Kill the Mood
- Pet Palace: He may be cool with the fact that she has a cat…or two, but when she allows all three dogs into the bedroom (or worse) on the bed, nothing stops nookie faster. Sure, Fido is a great companion, but pretty much any dude is going to be creeped out by staring pets and the sounds of panting that aren’t coming from his girl. So feel free to run the doggie daycare by day, but keep the pet motel out of the bedroom, as he will surely prefer a twosome to a menagerie.
- Grooming in Bed: Men aren’t naive; they know that women go to a lot of work to appear effortlessly beautiful. And, for the most part, they want that effort to stay behind closed doors. Sure, applying some lotion or a little lip gloss in bed is no big deal. But if she whips out the dental floss or the toenail clippers (ew!) in bed, it’s gonna be a sex-free zone tonight.
- Talking about an Ex: There is a time and place in the relationship when it is all fine and good to talk about the ex. The bedroom is not one of them. Even jokingly mentioning things like, “Steve never did that to me in bed,” or something that may seem like a compliment such as, “That is so much better than Antonio,” is a no-fly zone. Don’t do it. Talking about sex with an ex causes him to think about his girl with another man, which is going to deflate his manhood, and frankly, make him wonder why you are thinking about that other guy.
- Biting – non playfully: A playful nibble here and there can be a turn-on, but some men report women applying the dental work a little to heavily down there. No biting, ever. It hurts.
- Farting: Okay, this isn’t second grade anymore. Of course men know women fart. And maybe a little squeaker coming out in bed isn’t the end of the world, but a full-on blow-out after scarfing a half pot of chili is not going to end in booty-town.
- Too much dirty talk: On occasion, men do appreciate a session of adult fim viewing. That doesn’t necessarily mean they want to date a porn star. A few saucy sentences can spice things up, but dropping the f-bomb every two seconds, or calling him “daddy” in any way, can be real deal breakers for some guys.
- Hide and seek without the seeking: Playfully and sexily covering some skin adds to the excitement, but coming to bed in a parka and refusing to let a guy see any skin makes a chick seem insecure in herself, which is not especially sexy.
- Sexually unadventurous: Again, not that every guy is trying to emulate back breaking moves from the Kama sutra or expects wild and crazy sex every single time. But a girl who will only have vanilla sex, in bed, between the hours of 10-11 PM on Friday nights, may not give him the sexy adventure he is after.
- Smell bad: Men usually don’t want women to come to bed doused in a bottle of perfume (gag); and they often love some of that natural woman smell that is unique to each woman-but what a guy DOESN’T want is BO and bad breath. A shower is not a prerequisite to a sexy night in the sack, but if a lady just ran 5 miles at the gym or ate an onion sandwich, she might want to consider a trip to the dunk tank and a thorough teeth brushing. Girls don’t want guys to smell bad, and vice versa.
- Saying the L-word…on the first date: Everybody wants to be told they are loved…at some point. Spouting it off during a first sexual encounter, or after 1 or 2 dates, is sure to send him running for the hills. So ladies, don’t do it, unless an easy way out of the relationship is the goal!
Keeping His Penis Healthy
Most guys don’t seek out penis health products for themselves, even when their penis is in a state of disrepair. Ladies who want the penis to be silky smooth, healthy and yes, odor free, should hook their guy up with a penis health cream, especially one that contains bacterial and odor busting vitamin A, to keep that otherwise musty manhood shower fresh.
Most guys boast them as simple. However, this is quite the opposite and usually are very complicated. Under such situations, it often becomes difficult for any girl or woman to find the right guy. Luckily, the process of finding is no longer elusive. There are a few important factors that women could consider to come across the right guy.
Attitude is the key player in building the chemical between two people. Women have to work out on their attitude to make sure that can easily attract a guy. It is necessary to understand that every guy has a different taste. Women do not have to assume that men always look for women with big breasts. Relaxing is essential for any women before they venture out to look for the right guy. This is the first lesson that would be learning in how to attract a guy. Staying positive and maintaining the cool is important. Smile is a wonderful asset and creates a positive vibe to the opposite sex. The ability to keep others happy and in good company is a major attraction point. Creating positivity is a real charm and women benefit the same in return.
Confidence is the other area that women have to work hard. It is possible to stay confident when a person believes in self and loves self. Learning to love self is an art. It creates a wonderful atmosphere and easily attracts the opposite sex. Building and maintaining a good impression is essential. Learning to limit complaining and acting positively in any situation is another area that women should concentrate. Being proud of self accomplishments is the need of the hour. This will help build confidence level and paves path in attracting the right guy. This is a critical stage in learning how to attract a guy.
Past comparison will be helpful to look at the present change in attitude. Creating a goal will help elevate the level of confidence and other weak areas. Working constantly on improving self will help any individual to develop all the necessary qualities that will easily attract any guy. However, it is necessary to maintain the momentum for the rest of the life. Apart from relationships, these developments also help build a good reputation in the workplace. Body language is another area that women have to work with to maintain the momentum when they converse with a guy. Eye contact, honesty, open minded and humorous have immense attracting capabilities.
Learning how to attract a guy will help women who think they would never find one. The reasons could be numerous, but with constant development, it is possible to come across the guy that a girl has always wished to be with. Appearance also plays a good role in attracting a guy. In fact, appearance is the first element that catches the attention of the guy. Other elements follow the suit and give an opportunity for a girl or a women to keep the magic alive that helps build a good relationship with Mr. right.
Learn the skill of eye contact flirting with a woman by embracing your playful mindset and transferring your flirty, playful thoughts about the woman from your eyes directly into hers.
Do not make yourself unhappy thinking that your ex-boyfriend does not miss you. Instead, look on the bright side of things. Being away from each other represents an opportunity to your ex to miss you, and consider his decision of putting an end to the relationship. As the old saying goes “Absence makes the heart fonder” therefore, you should make yourself unavailable to your ex, instead of calling him or sending him messages.
This article covers a handful of important tips, that you can apply to trigger your ex’s curiosity and push him to miss you like he used to do when he first met you.
Give Him The Chance To Miss You:
If you make yourself too available to your ex, he won’t see the need to check on you from time to time. Since you are always calling and messaging him why would he bother knowing what you are up to? Your ex needs the time and space to realize your importance in his life. If you get into contact with your ex more than it is needed, it is like you never went away.
Moreover, acting in such a way will make you come across as a needy person. Your ex will take you for granted, and he will never take any steps toward mending the relationship.
Get Yourself Involved in activities:
When you go out to see friends and practice your favorite pastime, you will be able to keep yourself busy, and chase away any negative thoughts that can hold you back from enjoying your life to its fullest. You can even take a step further and send your ex some pictures of you having nice time.
Your goal is to show him that you have succeeded to create your own happiness by only relying on yourself. When your ex sees that you are leading a confident and brilliant life, he cannot help but wants to be part of it.
Take Care Of Your Appearance:
Never neglect the importance of your appearance. Always be sure to wear the clothes that your ex once made nice comments about them, when you both used to hang out with each other. This act will remind him of the great moments you once had together. When you look fantastic, you will have a considerable effect on your ex.
From time to time, send him a short and delightful message where you cleverly pass a remark about a place you both visited, and you know it will remind your ex of many beautiful souvenirs you both enjoyed.
Making it through infidelity often means among other things you are paying for someone else’s wrong choice.
There will be plenty of work to be taken care of after the affair because as a result of your actions you’ve done quite a lot of harm to your marital relationship which is hanging by a thread.
Nevertheless after talking things over they’ve made a decision to stick with you. That means there’s a lot of heavy lifting ahead with regards to surviving unfaithfulness. In spite of true love as well as hard work there are no assurances that life will ever be the same or even that the spousal relationship itself will continue. Nonetheless to ensure it will move in the right direction and beyond you need to be prepared to accept particular guidelines.
1. Stop The Deceit
No doubt stretching the truth was a huge part of your toolbox. Let’s be honest you can’t effectively carry out a marital affair without it.
But bear in mind making it through an affair means that it has to end at once should you ever expect to get back your spouse’s confidence. Any lie no matter how minute that gets discovered will wipe out any effort to rebuild the relationship. In the event that your spouse catches you in a small white lie then most likely they will assume that you’re being deceptive concerning other stuff.
And please, no self-delusional nonsense. You lied to shelter them or you didn’t feel it was a problem. It all adds up to the same thing which is you are going back to your old ways of deception which drove you to have an affair to begin with. The saying honesty is still the best plan of action has to be the foundation stone of your marriage with regard to making it through unfaithfulness.
2. Stop The Pity Party
You might think that all the radical changes in lifestyle that you are forced to go through as well as the monitoring system required to track your activities is not reflective of your actions. So you begin to have a pity party for yourself. You also make an effort to diminish what you did. Having an affair was not so terrible you say to yourself. Most certainly not in comparison with what you are having to go through now.
Stop right there. You are not the one that was cheated on and pretending that you are is only going to hinder the recovery. Step back from the situation and make the concerted effort to not focus on you. Rather focus on your spouse and the way they feel. In making it through unfaithfulness fixing the spousal relationship is the work of both sides however the individual affected the most is your mate whom you cheated on.
3. You Don’t Get To Decide
You come to a time in this rehab process and reach a decision that things are back to what they used to be therefore you start slacking on certain things. Wrong. It is important to recognize the fact that you can expect to eat humble pie for some time. How long is awhile? Until your spouse decides. It’s about them feeling better not you.
Surviving cheating means they in effect find themselves in charge of how things should go. No doubt they should obtain your input from time to time but in the long run it’s up to them. You can easily check the status of how things are going occasionally however don’t try to hurry the process along or attempt to mold your spouse into seeing things from your perspective. To be perfectly blunt you have already done enough manipulating while you were being unfaithful.
4. Pay Attention
There are certainly likely to be times when your wife or husband wishes to vent. It is oftentimes a truly necessary healing activity for getting over unfaithfulness. That could entail they have a discussion about what you did over and over. Be prepared to pay attention no matter how many times they bring it up. You wounded your significant other deeply and talking about it repeatedly is a method to deal with the pain.
Don’t assume your mate to discuss it several times and then feel a hundred percent better. Some people must attend therapy for many years to overcome overcoming an affair. Unfaithfulness in a marital relationship can ruin not only someone’s self respect but damage the their way of thinking to the point all they are able to think about is what their significant other did to them. It is an unpleasant process you you placed them in therefore prepare yourself whenever required to give your undivided attentiveness.
If you are looking to tell whether your girlfriend is cheating on you and going behind your back with someone else, tread carefully because not all signs discussed here will necessarily mean that your woman is for certain being unfaithful to you, however if you know what to look for, it may point you in the right direction.
Most people think that within a relationship cheating is only the man’s prerogative. Think again, because even though fewer ratios of women take part in cheating, it still happens none the less. The reason for a woman to cheat while still in a relationship usually arises from emotional dissatisfaction. Women are also much better at keeping their cheating a secret, so its best to keep a good eye out for the following tell-tale signs
How to Tell If Your Girlfriend is Cheating on You
The following is a list of some of the signs to look for if you are trying to determine whether or not your girlfriend is cheating on you.
1.) Her attitude towards intimacy and specifically sex changes. It is either she does not want to take part and avoids all levels of intimacy or her desire to be intimate with you increases drastically than ever before.
2.) She is now almost too nice. If you have ever heard of the phrase ‘If something is too good to be true, it likely is too good to be true’. This could be the case with your girlfriend. If out of the blue she starts becoming too accommodating to your wishes, tastes and suggestions, there is likely a reason for this, it could also mean that she is cheating on you, and her being nice is just another way to keep you happy and stifle her overwhelming guilt.
3.) She starts dressing very differently. If this is the case, then she is likely going through a change but could also be because she is dressing in a way that pleases somebody other than yourself.
4.) She tells you she has met a new friend who she needs to see regularly. The problem is she has not introduced you to her ‘new friend’ and neither is she willing to make the introduction between you and her ‘friend’.
5.) You are no longer her main priority. She may be indulging in extracurricular activities behind your back if she no longer has you as a top priority. Having other more important things to cater to outside of your relationship and making excuses as to why she may have forgotten events such as birth days, anniversaries, a dinner you had planned etc. is a sign of a woman falling out of love.
6.) She starts to use the word ‘I’ as opposed to using ‘we’. By using singular words, your girlfriend may be trying to disconnect herself from the relationship and is now viewing herself as a single unit. This is especially true if the relationship your are in is a longterm relationship, she could be cheating on you because she feels as if things have become too boring and predictable.
7.) All contacts and schedules are hidden from you. If your girlfriend maintains a closed schedule and hides her phone from you, chances are she is cheating on you and wants to keep her activities a secret. A relationship where both people have nothing to hide is one that employs transparency at all levels. So if your girlfriend knows that something you may come across will upset you, she is more likely to hide it away from sight.
8.) She does not care what you do. If she no longer asks you what you’re up to, where you are going or with whom you are going with, there is a high chance that she is being unfaithful and she does not want to risk asking about your whereabouts because there is a slight chance that you will want to know about her whereabouts as well.
All the signs listed above are common signals to look out for if you suspect that your girlfriend might be cheating on you. If you have a reason to doubt her, start taking note of the tell-tale signals.
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Does your man have a hard time lasting long enough in the bedroom to give you pleasure? Does it feel like right as things are starting to heat up, they are over? It is can really frustrating being with a partner who has a lack of control in bed. You don’t want to be yourself and rev up to your full sexual potential, because you worry that it will be too much for them and you want to get some pleasure too.
It doesn’t have to be this way. Although premature ejaculation is something that he needs to want to deal with firsthand and he will be the only one who can truly cure it, there are things that you can do that will help.
You can learn how to make your man last longer in the bedroom by using some special techniques. Even though these are all preventative measures, you can turn them into being something fun so you can still enjoy sex. Try out these premature ejaculation avoidance techniques for women and start having the sex you want tonight.
First of all, premature ejaculation is mainly caused by performance anxiety. He worries himself to orgasm too quickly. You can stop this by allowing him to make you orgasm before sex. Get him to perform oral on you as a means of foreplay, and do your best to have an orgasm at this time. That way, you are able to get the pleasure that you want and he is able to feel like he is worth something. This will take the pressure off of him in the bedroom and allow him to last longer.
The second way to make him last longer is to switch positions when he thinks he is getting close. You can usually tell when your guy is getting close to losing all control so when this moment strikes, pull the plug. Make him exit from your body and then maybe flip him on his back or get on your back and make love that way. Try slowing down the tempo too. This will help him out. Also, cut back on the dirty talk. Giving him too much sexy stimulation will send him over the edge and you don’t want that.
Another way to help your guy out to increase his sexual stamina is to tug at his testicles when he is close to orgasm. The reasoning behind this is because as he reaches climax, the testicles tend to retract into his body in a sense. They get closer to him in preparation of ejaculation. Stop this from happening. Reach around and grab him by the testicles, pulling them away slightly from his body. This won’t take much so you don’t have to pull on them too hard.
By using some of these premature ejaculation avoidance techniques on your guy, you can give him a serious boost in the bedroom and really propel his stamina to new lengths. You both can start having the sex that you want to have and both feel good about things after your sex sessions.
Google marriage counseling and you’ll find sites singing its praises; sites claiming it’s just a waste of time and money; self help programs saying you don’t need counseling if you just buy their program; and a bunch of therapist’s websites eagerly trying to get you to come to them.
This cacophony of information would be confusing enough at the best of times, but if you’re looking into marriage counseling it’s likely the most important part of your life is falling apart. The last thing you need right now is something else to think about.
There are only three things you need to know before deciding if marriage counseling is right for you.
1 – Does it work?
2 – Can I afford it?
And 3- Is my marriage worth saving?
Does marriage counseling work? With so many marriages in trouble the couples therapy business has to be booming right, and still it seems like everyone is getting divorced anyway. Sadly most couples just get divorced without ever seeing a marriage therapist. Because there are so many couples not seeking help, most marriage therapists work in other areas of mental health, and don’t actually do much if any marriage counseling.
Well that’s all very interesting but is couples counseling effective? Most of the time couples who do seek help, use marriage therapy as a kind of last ditch effort before divorce. The marriage is in serious distress, and often one person is not really engaged in the process. With emotionally focused marriage therapy, 75 percent of these generally distressed marriages show significant improvement after marriage counseling. For couples who don’t wait, and where both partners are engaged in the process the effectiveness of marriage counseling rises to 90 percent.
OK so marriage counseling works, but can I afford it? The price of marriage counseling ranges from about $75 an hour on the low end to above $200 an hour on the high end. To be effective most couples need to attend therapy once a week for about 8 to 12 weeks. If you’re bad at math you’re looking at between $600 and $2400. Realistically you’re going to spend about $1200.
Not an entirely insignificant amount, but good luck getting divorced for $1200, and how much is a happy emotionally satisfied marriage worth? Would you pay $1200 for your marriage to be more like it was when you first got married? And what are the emotional costs of staying in an unhappy marriage, what are the emotional costs of divorce, on you, on your spouse, on your children, parents, siblings, friends.
But is my marriage worth saving? The only person who can answer that is you. But let us be perfectly clear on this. This is a life defining question not to be taken lightly. Coming up with a real answer requires asking a bunch of other hard questions and some pretty deep soul searching, and maybe, just maybe some help that an outside professional dedicated to the happiness of individuals, couples, and families can provide.
Jared Whipple is a Marriage and Family Therapist, founding member of the Centre for Applied Positive Psychology, and the Director of the American Association of Mediators Counselors and Family Therapists. Jared is passionate about helping couples find happiness and avoid divorce.
Did you most recently learn that your own wife has been cheating on you? In case you have, you are likely unclear with regards to how you should proceed. You probably have a wide array of thoughts going through your mind, like pain, angry feelings, disillusionment, and despair.
As for the actions you will want to take, once you learn that your wife has been with someone else, Here are a few suggestions, These tips can help you to keep your emotions in check when coming face to face with your wife’s infidelity.
Step one is to let your wife know that you know. With that said, it is important to make certain that you do know. Do not face your wife unless you possess real proof that she was fooling around. No matter whether you hired a private eye or did it yourself you cannot accuse your wife of anything unless you are absolutely sure meaning the evidence is irrefutable.
It is also of the essence that you make a decision as to the future of the marital relationship. You must make your mind up as to what is right for you and your marriage. Could you continue living with your wife? Can you continue to put faith in her? Do you really feel that the marriage is definitely worth saving? These are questions that need to be answered before moving forward.
Once you have let the cat out of the bag and told your wife you know she has been unfaithful then you really must and should give her the chance to explain why she cheated. This is not going to easy given that your emotions are probably at a fever pitch but nevertheless you should regard this as a necessary step. To be totally honest, there is never really a suitable cause for infidelity in a marriage, but hear her out. Is there any kind of truth to just what she’s saying? Are you remote? Do you ever refrain from being sexually intimate with her? Once again, these aren’t good explanations for being unfaithful, but the responses to your own wife’s queries can help you to decide if your marriage is worth saving.
Speaking of restoring the spousal relationship, you along with your lady will want to talk over the long term with one another. Why? Because you never know what she is contemplating. Did your wife cheat because she could or because she was unsatisfied with the sex at home? Then again she may have met and fallen in love with someone else. Unfortunately it happens. If that’s what is going on, your wife may well prefer to just terminate the marital relationship entirely.
Get some sort of professional help. There are plenty of instances in a marriage relationship when assistance is necessary and infidelity is undoubtedly one of those situations. Have you a good friend or perhaps a trustworthy family member you could confide in? You might find your circumstances improving once you are in a position to have a discussion about it with someone that you know or trust. Concerning certified help a marriage counselor might be needed.
Again consider all the options mentioned above and think up a few more. If you can do this before confronting her so much the better. Stay away from anything that is going to take this bad situation and make it worse. A whole lot worse. It’s more than okay to be upset but two wrongs do not make a right. At this point it is up to you to take the positive route to ensure this whole process regardless of the outcome works out for both you and your wife.